Dear old golden rule days

It's back to school week for many. Last night, after my yoga practice, I made a pot of tea and recalled some of my most memorable moments from grade school. Some of them seemed SO traumatic at the time, but when I think of them now, I smile with love for the little person I used to be. So here they are:

First day of grade 1. I used to wear these awful baby doll pyjamas that included very puffy bottoms. I can recall clear as day the outfit I wore to my first day of first grade: red and green flannel overalls. Laugh if you must, but I loved them! Anyway, I was so excited about school, I forgot to take off the bottoms of my baby dolls before climbing into my outfit. On the walk to school, I realized my mistake and was absolutely terrified everyone would know. Who has their first wardrobe malfunction at age 5? Me.

The 2nd wardrobe malfunction. Grade 6 concert. I played the alto recorder. I was going through an "I refuse to wear a dress" phase. Mom took me to the Saan store (lol!!) and I picked out a summery pants suit. I was also going through an "I refuse to be seen with my parents" phase, so rather than drive with them to the school, I chose to walk there. My favourite shortcut involved hopping over a fence. I must have jumped that fence a billion times, but THIS time, my pants got caught on the way over and ripped the ass right out of them. There was no time to fix it, so everyone had the (dis)pleasure of watching me play in my underpants.

First test. Grade 1 spelling test. I got 7/10 and was absolutely devastated. I cried my eyes out on poor Ms Shulke's lap and mom had to come take me home. That might have been the last time I got a bad mark on a spelling test. Or any test, for that matter. Until med school, of course. But that's a whole other post. ;)

First heartbreak. Craig W. 10 year old with pierced ears and a leather jacket. I was head over heels in love with this guy. When he told me I looked like a rabbit, I thought I was going to die. Dirty Dancing came out that year. I remember the bus ride home from summer camp, and we played the soundtrack. I cried the whole way home. Unfortunately, my taste in men has not changed over time, and Dirty Dancing still gets me through the heartaches!

The kid who taught me more than the teachers did. David P. He was a nice kid, but everyone teased him. I can't actually remember why. He lived down the street from me. The teachers AlLWAYS paired me with him, accompanied by speeches that went something like this: "I know you are mature enough to handle this". So I was always his square dancing partner in gym class. And on lunch exchange field trips to Rundle Park, I had to switch lunches with him. It shames me to admit I was afraid to eat the egg salad sandwich he brought for me. But one day, in grade 5, after 5 years of getting paired up with David, I chose retaliation. I somehow managed to convince David that I could walk through walls. I walked home from school that day SO ashamed of myself. I apologized to him the next day, and have been on the side of the bullied ever since.

My over-the-top shyness. This was something I battled every single day. They tried to hold me back in grade 1 because of it. But there are two moments that stand out in particular. The first: I wrote a kick-ass Halloween poem in 5th grade. I was asked to read it at a school assembly, but I was WAY to terrified to even think about it. My teacher, Mr N, read it, and I wanted to die when the whole gym shrieked at the scary part. Sometime around then I was asked to recite the girl guide oath at our flying up ceremony (or whatever the heck it's called). I froze at the microphone and ran away. Everyone laughed. Again, mortified!

A defining moment. Remember the Canada Fitness testing we had to do as kids? I sucked at it. I couldn't even reach the standards to get the bronze badge. I got the "thanks for participating" award every damn year. In grade 6, I told Mr McPherson I would only do it if I could get a gold badge. After getting permission from my parents, I spent every lunch break for weeks with Mr McPherson practicing long jumps, sit ups, chin ups, running, all of it. Testing day came, and I managed to surpass the gold standards and was given the "award of excellence". I still have that badge. This resulted in another mortifying school assembly, as my "set your mind to it, and you'll succeed" story made headlines in the local newspaper. I also got to run with my best friend, Jody, at a competition at the Butterdome that year. Is it possible I peaked at the age of 12?